Category Archives: Life after Loss

Life After Loss – The First Time Traveling Alone

Life After Loss – The First Time Traveling Alone

My husband was the person who took care of everything when we traveled. My only job was to show up and be pretty. He used to encourage me to pack many outfits that could be used later for my blog. In his backpack, there would be snacks, drinks, makeup touchup essentials, a jacket, and a pair of flat shoes for me since he knew at some point I would have enough of the heals and I’m always cold. πŸ˜‰

Life after loss the first time travel alone

This trip was a totally different story. The night before I left, I realized my LV or Chanel small cross body bags were not that practical. I went out bought myself my very first backpack. Since now it is me who has to carry everything, I packed really light and gave up on heels and fancy dresses.

Life after loss the first time travel alone

For me, the first goal of this trip was not losing my phone or wallet. The second was to not get sick or hurt and the last one was to enjoy myself. πŸ˜‰ I know, my standards are pretty low. I was quite nervous about this trip since I was living in a bubble the last 10 years as a princess. Now, I feel like I am lacking a lot of life skills. I was crying the night before and really wished he was there with me for the trip.

Life after loss the first time travel alone

My first flight from Detroit to LA was late and sat on the runway for 45 minutes. I was told my second flight would wait for me. I ran from one terminal to another and when I finally got to the gate, it was closed. I was put on standby for 4 hours, where I literally stood by the flight podium for two hours, but still didn’t get on the flight. Later, I had to fly to Vegas and then finally to Honolulu. My 12 hour flight turned into a 40 hour nightmare. But, on day 2 when I finally stepped into my hotel room, I opened the window and saw the ocean view and instantly felt everything was worth it. πŸ˜‰

Life after loss the first time travel alone

But it seemed like the bad luck was still with me on day 3. I booked the active volcano tour to the Big Island. I had to get up at 4am to catch my flight. I went downstairs to get myself a cup of coffee. I sat on the shuttle bus and took a sip, my belly instantly felt burning. When I looked down, my coffee had spilled and already spread all over my chest. GREAT! I never knew that I need to double check whether the cap was closed completely. It was always my husband who handed me drinks and he would make sure everything was ok. This was my once in a lifetime opportunity to take some great photos when I hop on my helicopter to see the volcanos and lava, and now my whole front was covered with coffee! I didn’t swear or get upset, I just told myself I needed to buy a t-shirt before I get into my chopper. Long story short, after many attempts, I finally got myself a tee and was ready to go up… then I was told the helicopter tour had to be cancelled due to the weather. What?!

Life after loss the first time travel alone

I went hiking in Volcano National Park with my tour group. I couldn’t help but search for my man. Although there was nothing that looked familiar other than the sky, I suddenly missed his warm and thick hands. He always held my hand wherever we went. We hiked together a few times and we always had so much to talk and laugh about. But now, it was just so quiet. At end of the day, we finally saw lava and a place where the lava went into the ocean. Standing on the cliff alone, facing the ocean I suddenly bursted into tears. “We made it honey” was all I could say in my head at that moment. On the way back to the airport, I sat alone and cried the whole way. Suddenly familiar music started to play, it was one of our favorite songs called ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’ by Israel Kamakawiwo’Ole. I instantly smiled even with tears still in my eyes. I know it was my husband trying to comfort me.

Life after loss the first time travel alone

After the first 3 tough days, I decided I had enough and it was time for me to enjoy myself. I am on vacation, not in a prison, right? So I did my homework and found some great restaurants and more activities to do. I finally hopped on a chopper to see the whole island of Oahu. Although it was not the lava view I initially planned on, the experience was amazing. I also had my first snorkeling experience. After that, my real vacation started. I was surprised that I was still very happy eating dinner at a restaurant by myself. I initiated a lot of conversations with strangers and I was so grateful because I met so many great people on this trip.

Life after loss the first time travel alone

Life after loss the first time travel alone

Life after loss the first time travel alone

Now I am home safe with my phone and wallet. πŸ˜‰ The most important outcome from this trip is I feel more confident. It was kind of like a test for myself. When I am at home, I’m comfortable and I don’t have a lot of difficult situations come up, but this trip showed me how things could go wrong. Lucky, I was able to manage everything and still enjoyed my time. Now, to plan my summer trip to Paris!;)

Life after loss the first time travel alone

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|

Meet our co-host Rania from The Wardrobe Stylist

Rania’s Biography:
Branding herself The Wardrobe Stylist, Rania began styling and blogging nearly a decade ago. She worked with a long list of clients and as a blogger, she covered several coveted events. She recently launched the Reversible Pocket Square. Made from 2 distinct fabrics, the reversible pocket square takes a modern and innovative shift on the age old accessory, allowing the wearer to choose which side to showcase or have both sides conveniently peak through.

Please visit her or follow her on your favorite social medias below:
Instagram:
Bloglovin:
Google +:


Grace
http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

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Life After Loss – The First Birthday Without My Husband

Life After Loss – The First Birthday Without My Husband

The birthdays before I met my husband were sad and torturous. I wished somebody would say “Happy Birthday” to me at least. My Mom and Dad never remembered my birthdays. Now, as you can imagine, I hated birthdays. I honestly don’t even remember how I spent my 30th birthday. I guess It was just another day, or maybe worse than a normal day. πŸ˜‰ After I met my husband, he was so angry that I was treated that way. He said he will make up for all the hard times I had and from now on, it will be only good times!

He did follow through.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

My husband planned a surprise birthday party in Shanghai for me, but my best friend told me everything beforehand. My husband was still mad at her after many years for wrecking the surprise. πŸ˜‰ Anyway, I got a lot of gifts for the first time in my whole life. We had a great dinner and wonderful time that day. But above all, the most amazing feeling I got was to feel like I was worth it.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

My man always made every birthday of mine very special. For my first one in America, I got more people to celebrate this special day of mine. My in-laws and sister-in-laws called me and sang Happy Birthday. My step-daughter secretly baked my first homemade birthday cake. From that moment I knew my husband not just gave me all his love, he also gave me a family that I never had.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

The highlights of all those years birthday has to be my 40th birthday. This time he finally pulled off his surprise party. πŸ˜‰ There were so many family and friends there when I walked in. He even had an improve comedy group involved. I certainly feel like I was the most spoiled wife in the world. πŸ™‚

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

This is my first birthday without my man. I was not sure what my day would look like, or if I even wanted to celebrate it. I have to be honest with you, it turned out to be by far the funnest birthday ever! Several weeks before my birthday, my step-daughter and her fiancΓ© had already demanded I leave that day unscheduled. Birthday morning, they came in when I was still in my bed and they cooked a delicious breakfast for me. She made me wear a sparkly birthday crown and purple glitter birthday sash and took me to two surprise activities.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

The first one was pottery making. I have always want to try this but somehow just never did. The instructor had to do some quick operations to save my bowl but I am pretty happy with the result. πŸ˜‰

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

The second activity was painting. My husband and I decided to go to Paris to celebrate if he could beat the cancer. My step-daughter picked the Eiffel Tower to paint.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

Overall, the first birthday without my husband was not bad at all. My husband is not physically here with me anymore, but I see him everywhere in my life. My step-kids all love cooking and enjoying life just like him. My step-daughter always takes care of me just like him. My sister-in-laws call me or text me just like him…… The only difference now is that he is not just one person, he is in many of us who loved him dearly.

Life After Loss the First Birthday Without My Husband

Photo credits: Ashley Buck.

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|SHOP MY LOOK:|

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|

Meet our co-host Rania from The Wardrobe Stylist

Rania’s Biography:
Branding herself The Wardrobe Stylist, Rania began styling and blogging nearly a decade ago. She worked with a long list of clients and as a blogger, she covered several coveted events. She recently launched the Reversible Pocket Square. Made from 2 distinct fabrics, the reversible pocket square takes a modern and innovative shift on the age old accessory, allowing the wearer to choose which side to showcase or have both sides conveniently peak through.

Please visit her or follow her on your favorite social medias below:
Instagram:
Bloglovin:
Google +:


Grace
http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

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