Tag Archives: Life after Loss

Life after Loss—Preparing For The End of Life

Preparing For The End of Life

This is actually an old post I scheduled two days before my husband passed away.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

“I know this is such a heavy topic. Few of us are comfortable talking about death, whether our own or a loved one’s. It is a scary, even taboo subject for many. Luckily, my husband and I are comfortable talking about it.

Preparing For The End of Life

Actually, we can just talk about anything and we don’t have any secrets from each other. We are soul mates. I know it sounds corny. I was very surprised to realize many years ago that my soul mate did not look like what I imagined. First, he is not even a Chinese, didn’t even speak any Chinese, well, that is not entirely true. He can say beer in Chinese at least. 😉 He is not my generation, he is bald and overweight…

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

But soul mates are all about the souls, right? Nobody said the two people have to match perfectly when you look at them, well, maybe in movies. My friend called us “The Beauty and the Beast”. You can guess which was which! We don’t care what others had to say. We only knew the food tasted better when we are eating together. We have so much to talk about, even now after being married many years. He is the one usually being the smarty pants and makes me laugh, but once in a while, I am able to throw out a joke and make him laugh very hard too.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

We call ourselves weirdos because we are just happy together, silly together no matter what. He lost almost 80 pounds due to his cancer. And we are joking all the time how different the view is now that he can see his toes. I have cried a lot lately because doctors are giving us the final days count down. First is maybe a year or two, then maybe less than a year, then less than half year, 3 months, and now maybe less than 8 weeks. I often cried so hard I almost choked, and suddenly he said something very funny, I was laughing so hard.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

We have talked a lot about the end of life and he said he has no regret at all. We had such a good life and good time together, of course we can use a lot more time but it is out of our control. We have traveled around the world, tasted many yummy or strange foods, created countless joyful moments. Our relationship and love are so rare and pure that we are so lucky we can find each other in this lifetime.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

I lost my dad to cancer when I was in my high school. I totally shut down for 3 days without saying a single word or crying because I was so shocked and angry. I was like a zombie and my friends were so worried. Many people had tried many ways to take care of me and give me comfort. I do not know what will happen this time. It is a lot harder than losing my dad. My man is not just my husband, he is also my best friend, and a father figure. So I will lose 3 people at the same time.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

I know it doesn’t matter how much we talk about or prepare, when it happens, my heart and world will be shattered.”

Now I know, it really doesn’t matter how much we prepared. It is never enough. I didn’t shut down this time, instead I let people in to my life. Losing my husband is the hardest thing that has ever happened to me. But the positive part is, it also brought our family more closer together than ever.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

All videos and photos if not credited otherwise, are by Robert Buck and Grace Liang.

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|


Grace
http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

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Life after Loss—Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

Life after Loss—Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

It has been two weeks since my husband passed away. You can read my FB post here if you haven’t seen it. My step-daughter Ashley did a great job on the obituary.

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

I intentionally avoided talking about my family in order to protect them. But now, I think it is the time to let more people know about my husband and how amazing he is. Below is the post my step-son Bobby wrote:

“As many of you may or may not realize I never really post. I like to make them count I guess.

Today my dad passed away. He just put up a year long fight with Double-Hit Lymphoma. From what I’ve seen it’s one of, if not the most, aggressive and difficult Lymphatic Cancers we know of.

While it is one of the saddest days of my life and we exchanged no words today, he has caused every one of my many laughs I’ve had today. He was a strong, smart, and funny guy. He had a joke, appropriate or otherwise, for everything. He always had an answer too. But he would want us to celebrate his life, not be sad at his passing. So from here on out I’ll do my best to only shed tears from laughing at his jokes and memories. Next time any of you have a drink or a barbeque tell a joke in his honor and raise a small toast.

Dad, I’ll think back fondly at our time together, my nearly 30 years was far too short to lose you, but I’ve had so many good memories that you will never truly be gone. You’ll be with me for every episode of Star Trek, James Bond movie, and read through of Lord of the Rings, you’re in every Ford Focus, Dodge Challenger, and every other car you helped design. I am who I am because of you and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I miss you and love you dad. See you around, baldy.”

And below is the post from my step-daughter Ashley.

“For those of you who don’t know, my Dad has been fighting a very rare aggressive form of lymphoma for the past year. It is something he wanted to keep private so I have respected his wishes by keeping it off of Facebook. The prognosis was not good. Most people do not make it beyond 6 months after diagnosis. He made it nearly 1 year.

My Dad was/is one of the best, most positive, funny people I know. Rather than sit back and take it, he put up a very impressive fight. Over 10 types of chemo and so many rounds I lost track. Plus multiple rounds of radiation and countless hospital stays. Most people would have given up, but every time it was suggested, he was postive that was not how this would end. Each treatment stopped working in time, but rather than giving up, he asked what was next. Through everything he never lost his positivity, humor, sarcasm, wit and enthusiasm to live.

He was determined to beat it and gave it hell. We have tried to make light of it and when he had to get a walker I blinged it out for him immediately, including flashing lights and a bell. If you can’t laugh, you have nothing. Cancer can take a lot of things from the people it touches, and I’m glad his wit, humor, and postive outlook were with him till the end.

Today I lost my Dad just before 2 PM. It feels surreal and wrong. I’m pretty sure I’m still in shock. There’s no way this can be happening, but I know deep down it is. Like he’s going to text me and be like “just kidding.” It’s something we knew was a real possibility, but never seemed real. I’m happy with how much time I’ve spent with him over the past year and have no regrets. I’m proud of how we all handled it together. We will get through it, it will suck, but I promised him we’d all be fine and that is one promise I will keep. I love you Dad Robert Buck, and always will. I’m sorry I didn’t say it more, even though I know you knew so without me saying it. I hope where ever you are, you’re giving them hell. ”

It has been super difficult, but my family and I are doing pretty well as you can see here. We still eat, drink and play card games. Just like the obituary said, we are honoring him by picking ourselves up and enjoying our lives again, even though now it is without him. We can’t see him anymore, but he is right here in our hearts and will continue to live through us.

Today is officially the first day I am back to the blogging world. I will start a ‘Life after Loss’ series every Monday on my blog. See you then!

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

Life after Loss---Conquering Grief and Finding Hope

All videos and photos if not credited otherwise, are by Robert Buck and Grace Liang.

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|

Meet our co-host Rania from The Wardrobe Stylist

Rania’s Biography:
Branding herself The Wardrobe Stylist, Rania began styling and blogging nearly a decade ago. She worked with a long list of clients and as a blogger, she covered several coveted events. She recently launched the Reversible Pocket Square. Made from 2 distinct fabrics, the reversible pocket square takes a modern and innovative shift on the age old accessory, allowing the wearer to choose which side to showcase or have both sides conveniently peak through.

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Grace

http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

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