Tag Archives: Living with cancer

Life after Loss—Preparing For The End of Life

Preparing For The End of Life

This is actually an old post I scheduled two days before my husband passed away.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

“I know this is such a heavy topic. Few of us are comfortable talking about death, whether our own or a loved one’s. It is a scary, even taboo subject for many. Luckily, my husband and I are comfortable talking about it.

Preparing For The End of Life

Actually, we can just talk about anything and we don’t have any secrets from each other. We are soul mates. I know it sounds corny. I was very surprised to realize many years ago that my soul mate did not look like what I imagined. First, he is not even a Chinese, didn’t even speak any Chinese, well, that is not entirely true. He can say beer in Chinese at least. 😉 He is not my generation, he is bald and overweight…

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

But soul mates are all about the souls, right? Nobody said the two people have to match perfectly when you look at them, well, maybe in movies. My friend called us “The Beauty and the Beast”. You can guess which was which! We don’t care what others had to say. We only knew the food tasted better when we are eating together. We have so much to talk about, even now after being married many years. He is the one usually being the smarty pants and makes me laugh, but once in a while, I am able to throw out a joke and make him laugh very hard too.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

We call ourselves weirdos because we are just happy together, silly together no matter what. He lost almost 80 pounds due to his cancer. And we are joking all the time how different the view is now that he can see his toes. I have cried a lot lately because doctors are giving us the final days count down. First is maybe a year or two, then maybe less than a year, then less than half year, 3 months, and now maybe less than 8 weeks. I often cried so hard I almost choked, and suddenly he said something very funny, I was laughing so hard.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

We have talked a lot about the end of life and he said he has no regret at all. We had such a good life and good time together, of course we can use a lot more time but it is out of our control. We have traveled around the world, tasted many yummy or strange foods, created countless joyful moments. Our relationship and love are so rare and pure that we are so lucky we can find each other in this lifetime.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

I lost my dad to cancer when I was in my high school. I totally shut down for 3 days without saying a single word or crying because I was so shocked and angry. I was like a zombie and my friends were so worried. Many people had tried many ways to take care of me and give me comfort. I do not know what will happen this time. It is a lot harder than losing my dad. My man is not just my husband, he is also my best friend, and a father figure. So I will lose 3 people at the same time.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

I know it doesn’t matter how much we talk about or prepare, when it happens, my heart and world will be shattered.”

Now I know, it really doesn’t matter how much we prepared. It is never enough. I didn’t shut down this time, instead I let people in to my life. Losing my husband is the hardest thing that has ever happened to me. But the positive part is, it also brought our family more closer together than ever.

Life after Loss---Preparing For The End of Life

All videos and photos if not credited otherwise, are by Robert Buck and Grace Liang.

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|


Grace
http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

There are a lot of people who said they can’t believe what I am going through my life now based on how I look, speak, and act. Yes, I am trying very, very hard to make it as normal as I can.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

So how am I holding up in the darkest time of my life? I only focus on my purpose. At this moment of my life, my purpose is giving my husband the best care I can. Making sure he is comfortable, warm, clean, and protect his dignity.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

I had been the most spoiled woman on earth. Before my husband was sick, I have never filled my own gas tank. He had given me the best care a man can give a women in the last decade, so I am very grateful that I have the chance to take care of him.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

He is the person who let me experience the unconditional love, not even my parents. He always says he is the luckiest man because he has a wife like me. But the last few years, I kept telling him, I am the luckiest woman to marry him. He gave me a family which I never had. I am loved, cared for and respected.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

I am still trying to put makeup on, to dress comfortably. Because I don’t want him to feel I am giving up on myself, or on us. It is not the end of the world yet, because we are still together, holding hands and smiling at each other.

How am I holding up in the darkest time of life?

All videos and photos if not credited otherwise, are by Robert Buck and Grace Liang.

Thank you for reading, and if you like what you read, please comment below or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follower me on FaceBook and Twitter for new post updates, and follow me on Instagram for all the amazing fashion, beauty and life style products that I will share with you, of course don’t forget to check out my Instagram story daily to know me better as a person. Finally don’t forget to follow me on YouTube for my fashion, beauty and life style videos. Have a great day and see you soon!

|TODAY’S LINKUP PARTY:|

Meet our co-host Rania from The Wardrobe Stylist

Rania’s Biography:
Branding herself The Wardrobe Stylist, Rania began styling and blogging nearly a decade ago. She worked with a long list of clients and as a blogger, she covered several coveted events. She recently launched the Reversible Pocket Square. Made from 2 distinct fabrics, the reversible pocket square takes a modern and innovative shift on the age old accessory, allowing the wearer to choose which side to showcase or have both sides conveniently peak through.

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Grace

http://colorandgrace.com occasionally receives vendor/ brand sponsorships for mentioning their products and services.

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