Life After Loss Dream Big and Believe In It

It has been more than 9 months since my husband passed away. I had a super long week, so last Friday I cooked myself a nice dinner and decided to give myself a break by not turning on my computer. Instead, I watched a Chinese movie. It was just a typical chick flick and was based on a couple who met, but, for whatever reasons, couldn’t be together in 3 life times. I have read some articles about reincarnation before and that evening I just kept thinking of my man. Was he already starting his next life? Will he try to find me? This life is still too long for me and I really wanted to follow him to wherever he is. I was crying non-stop for about an hour that evening.

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

I felt comfort when I thought about ending my life and going to the next life with my man together. It felt good and safe to know that I know he will be there for me. Later I suddenly realized I slipped into that black hole again and I knew I needed to stop thinking like that right away. That black hole of deep sorrow was taking over and controlling me. It made me bitter and didn’t care about anything. I needed to look away and look further in the future, to see my hopes and dreams again.

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

No matter where you’re from, your dreams are valid. My life has totally proved this idea. If I didn’t have some big and wild dreams when I was young, I could have been an unattractive middle-aged women who already totally gave up on looking good or feeling good because life is tough. I’d probably have a minimum wage job, and be living with an abusive husband with no skills or ability to live on my own. I have seen many of my childhood friends in China who are living like this right now. It just makes me feel so thankful for all the risks that I have taken and all the wild dreams that I have pursued.

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

If your dreams don’t scare you, then they’re not big enough. So, let’s all take a few days to just dream big. In the next 10 years, where is the dream place that you would love to live? Will you be up for winning a bidding war in order to get your hands on your dream home? What is your dream job or business? What type of people you will surround yourself with? If you answers are positive to all these questions, then they can be more than dreams if you put your mind to it. Dream big and see those dreams as clearly and vividly as you can. Write them out in great detail!

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

The only thing holding you back from a better and happier life is yourself. We can be our own worst enemies in so many ways, especially when we don’t believe wholeheartedly in ourselves. We need to not just dream big, but believe it in too! Hold tight to those dreams, knowing that we can and will do anything in our power to make them a reality. We need to have wild visions of our life that we know we are destined to live, even if we are not living it today, in this very moment. In 3 years, you will start to see it if you work for it. Remember, your current life is the result of your decisions that you made 3 years ago. So dream big and make the right decisions. 😉

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

I believe it with all my heart that when I move out of a bad place in my life, I will be a better and stronger person. I have been tested, tutored and beat up, but I am still able to look darkness in the eye and tell it, “I will win!” Yes, life can seemingly suck at times. It can put you in a bubble of negative energy if you let it. You must break through the negativity, and work towards building something new so that you can find the positive energy and understand that all those tough situations are temporary.

Life After Loss Dream Big And Believe In It

You can read all Life After Loss series here and Living with Cancer series here.


Photo credit: Grace Liang/Ashley Buck

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  1. Grace, another beautiful and touching post! I love that you are able to allow yourself to sit in the dark feelings and give them a moment in time. They need to be processed. But you are also able to know that you won’t stay there forever. Because you are strong and you will win against any darkness that comes into your life. Keep dreaming those big dreams, my friend, and so will I! Thanks for inspiring me.


  2. Ellese

    Thank you for being so honest and open. I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what that must be like. I have gone through a lot of pain and understand the dark hole. Music and dreaming me helps me as well. Love the outfit, sending you lots of love!



  3. Stephanie

    Hi! First time visiting your site. Such an inspirational post! I can’t imagine what I would do if I didn’t have my husband. He is my everything. Sometimes I feel going down a black hole myself just because life gets tough, but nothing compared to your pain. These words definitely light up the way for me. There are worst things out there, and I should never stop dreaming and chasing my dreams.

    Thank you!

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