Gracefully Grieving

Changing Our Mindset in Order to Heal from Grief

Have you ever wished you owned a time machine so you could go back and save your deceased loved one? I know I did many times! I begged, yelled and bargained to bring my husband back. It didn’t work of course! This took place a few months after I lost my late husband during one of my hour long crying spells on his ashes. I was so tired of being miserable and decided to change my reaction in order to intentionally save myself from my misery. Now, 3 years after I lost him, changing my reaction was the turning point of my life and I am able to live my dream life again!

Have you noticed that in our lives, our RESPONSE is where our power lies? No matter where you are in your grieving journey, eventually it all comes down to one choice: your response! Below are 3 questions to help you change your mindset and start to intentionally heal yourself!

Question #1: What response can you choose that will make you feel better?

For example, I made the choice to take care of my mind and body. I talked about my emotions to process my grief and decided to eat healthier and workout regularly. What will be your RESPONSE to feel better?

Question #2: What response can you choose that will make you feel loved without your deceased loved one?

For example, I made the choice to learn how to love myself and boy it wasn’t easy. When I was doubting myself (which was quite often), I started to learn how to talk to myself like my late husband used to do so I could remind myself of how capable and loveable I was. I learned to say “I LOVE YOU” each morning and night to myself. What will be your RESPONSE in order to still feel loved?

Question #3: What response can you choose to help you see hope again?

For example, I had no clue what my life would look like or if I would ever happy again. However, I made the choice to honor my late husband’s love by learning to enjoy my life again without him. All he wanted was to make me happy, so now, I MAKE myself happy to honor him. What will be your RESPONSE in order to see hope again?

What were some of your responses to the above questions? What worked? What do you plan to try? I can’t wait to hear your response!

Thank you for reading! If you like what you read, please comment below, or share it with your friends. Don’t forget to follow me on my Facebook page Color and Grace, Instagram and LinkedIn account for more practical tips on how to suffer less and heal faster! If you would like to learn more about healing yourself, sign up for my free webinar by clicking on the following link:


Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional!

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Christ follower, wife, mom, and two time best selling author. Don't preach the message, become the message!


  • Shelbee on the Edge

    Grace, first of all, this dress is so amazing! You are so beautiful, my friend! Second, these changes in perspective are so valuable. While I have never lost a spouse, I did lose both of my parents far too young. I remember one year I treated myself to a very expensive gift that my father was always going to get for me but then he died. About 8 years after he died, I had an opportunity to do this thing for myself so I did and I called it a gift from daddy. It was the most amazing feeling! Keep shining your light and inspiring the world, my friend!


    • Grace Liang

      Shelbee, I really appreciate all the support you have shown me over the years and you taking the time to share who you are with others. Losing a parent let alone both parents must have been really difficult. To hear that you were able to do something for yourself like that in memory of your father makes me smile!

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